Today you are five…
I can’t quite believe it was 5 years ago you were placed in my arms. It was a long time coming a whole 40 weeks.
I remember the day like it was yesterday.
We were decorating at the time and the flat was no where near ready for a new baby. The day before you arrived was when it all happened.
I packed your daddy off to work, and I feeling unwell decided to have a bath. I called your daddy to let him know, but he decided to stay at work for a while as I was suffering with a mild belly ache and we were unsure if this was it!
9am came and i decided to call up and get you daddy home! I was not feeling great and I wanted him close by..
He arrived home and got on with the decorating whilst I was suffering with contractions, I called the hospital and was advised to stay at home until I could no longer cope.
By 1pm I was not coping so we decided to go in. The car journey was painful and yet the longest ever.
I was checked in and looked over but it was not time and I was told to go home, and try and rest. Just as we were about to leave I was told it was actually best I stay as some levels came back abnormal.
Both me and the midwives were quite shocked at how erratic and long my contractions were so thinking I was nearer the end rather than just starting I was checked again, but let down when I was only 3cm.
I was given some help with some gas and air, and I was adamant that was all I was having.
I tried to eat but I couldn’t manage anything between the erratic contractions. By 7pm I was given some pethadine to help control the pain. I was then in a drowsy sleep till 10pm.
By 10pm my levels had not changed, so I was put on a drip to keep them up and moved to the labour ward to be watched 24/7
To be honest from 10 till about 2 I don’t remember much, just in and out of sleep, and waking at every contraction.
This is when you little madam, picked up your game.
First of, I was told to push, I thought yes! I had done it, I had progressed far enough to push you out and meet you. Then I was told to stop.
I vaguely heard, that a monitor had to be attached to you head to monitor how distressed you were.. I didn’t even know it had got to the distressed stage. I was so out of it, It felt like I was watching rather than being there going through it.
Before me and your daddy new it, I was signing a consent form for “help” I was being rushed down for a forceps delivery. Not what I wanted, the thought of forceps sends shivers down my spine.
Seconds later, another form was being placed in my hand to sign, unaware and not being told what was happened I looked at daddy for reassurance that everything would be ok, but he was a wreck in the corner. I turned back to a lot of midwives ad doctors rushing around. I was signing my life away it seemed! I was going to theatre for a emergency C-Section. You needed to come out. Now.
From then on it was all a rush, everything was taken away from me, I had not pain relief and the pethadine had worn of, so it was a painful 15 minutes which felt like hours.
Once I was relaxed and on the theatre table, daddy was allowed in, he held my hand so tightly. Before we knew it, you were lifted up before us.
A gorgeous girl
A big girl
I was mesmerised form the beginning
The moment I set eyes on you I was in love. All 10lb of you.
The joy you have bought us is amazing. You have your moments, but you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t.
I hope you have a wonderful birthday beautiful girl.